Be My Saftey Net
by The Black Rose Of The West
Summary: Harry feels like his life is nothing more than pain. He began cutting himself after Sirius died and only more death followed after. There is nothing Harry wants from life. All he wants to do is die, and die in peace. He has no one...or does he?
1. A Saftly Net

A safety Net

Harry stared down at his arm for a moment before moving his sleeve back down. He could feel the blood oozing down his arm. It made him forget. Forget the pain that had happened though out the entire war. Lossing friends. Lossing family. Lossing Sirius. Harry winced as he thought the name. His godfather. His best friend. The closest thing he ever had to a parent. Gone because of Bellatrix. Then, about a year later, Mad-Eye. Then Dobby. Then Snape. Then Fred. Then Remus and Tonks...and so many others. It hurt to think about it. Ron and Hermione had each other. After the war Bill and Fleur broke the marrige off and now was gone, but Bill had family-something Harry didn't have. Ginny broke up with him and was now with someone else. It seemed everyone had someone-dead or alive-but him. His aunt and uncle were gone. He didn't even have someone to talk to.

Harry angerly wiped the tears that threatened to fall harshly. All he had left was what Sirius left him-which was all he owned. The house. The pain in the ass house elf. But all of it didn't matter when you couldn't fill complete. Little by little Harry knew he was going to die alone. Alone and without care at all. Harry didn't care what someone said, he was doomed and done for.

A knock at the door made Harry turn. He wasn't expecting to have someone over-the war only being over for two weeks. Shouldn't they be with family? Harry dragged his feet to the door as another knock was placed on the door. He opened the door to see Bill and Charlie. Now he wanted answers.

"Yes?" Harry asked.

"Come on, we have something to show you." Bill said.

"And by 'we' we mean the entire family." Charlie added.

Harry stared at them.

"We'll drag you." Charlie threatened.

Harry sighed but didn't put up a fight. He knew he wouldn't win and they would find out about the cutting he'd been doing...since fifth year.

"Lead the way." Harry muttered in defeat.

Bill and Charlie smiled and began to walk.

Harry walked behind them silently.

Bill looked at Harry from the corner of his eye. He knew the whole war was hard on Harry but he didn't know just how _hard_ it was. It was impossable to know how Harry felt but Bill knew he was in pain. But different from what he himself was in. His wife had left. Harry had lost the closest family he had. It was different pain but in a way, it was the same pain. It hurt. It was a pain that stung the heart. It was one in the same. A sound made Bill to see Harry on his hands and knees.

Charlie helped Harry up. "You ok?"

Harry nodded. "Yeah, just tripped over something."

"We're close to the Burrow anyway, we'll Appate." (sorry if spelled wrong). Bill said.

The three disappeared, reappearing at the Burrow seconds later.

"Harry, dear, good to see you." Molly said, hugging Harry.

Harry lightly hugged her back. "You too."

"Hey Harry." Ron said shyly. After he and Hermione getting together, things were tense between the three frinds.

Harry nodded before turning back to Bill and Charlie. "What was it you wanted me to see?"

"Your room." Molly said.

Harry turned around. "My...what?"

"Room. Dad played around with the house and made it bigger. Now we all have our own rooms." Ron said.

"Oh, um hi Harry." Ginny said.

Harry nodded, not knowing what to say.

Bill put a hand on Harry's back to keep him moving up the stairs.

"Thanks." Harry said quietly.

Bill nodded. "This is your room, Mum'll get you when dinner's done." He turned.

"Are you and Charlie staying now?"

"Yeah, after what happened and all, we're staying this time."

Harry nodded. "Ok."

Bill left.

Harry walked inside his new room. The walls were painted a green color and the bed sheets were a light green and red. Harry sat on the bed and sighed softly. It wasn't the same. Not anymore. This time, he wanted to be at home, cutting away his pains with the razor he had. He pulled it out of his jeans pocket and stared at it for a moment before putting it to his already wonded arm and sliced. He moaned brokenly as blood poured from the cut. He closed his eyes to enjoy the feeling his now stinging arm. He dropped the razor, which fell under the bed with a small cladder. He could feel himself slipping away...slowly slipping away.

He heard a muffled voice but didn't care, he was finally free of his horrable life. Finally free.


	2. Peace At Mind?

Peace At Mind

Harry slowly opened his eyes to see only white. He stared, thinking he was in the hospitel, but he somehow knew he wasn't. Soon, it dawned on him. He was in the after life...again. He looked around, now seeing anyone. Soon, he felt a presnce behind him and turned to see...a small sound escaped him. It was a while before he could move his feet toward a person he had missed so much. Harry slowly walked toward him, heart pounding, and on the brake of tears.

"S-Sirius." Harry whispered, his arms slowly wrapping around Sirius' waist.

Sirius wrapped his arms around Harry's shoulders.

"I missed you."

Sirius kissed Harry's head. "I missed you too." His fingers ran through Harry's messy hair.

Harry nudged his hand. "Sirius." He whispered.

Sirius smiled. "It's ok."

"I know that."

Sirius took them to a bed.

Harry laid down.

Sirius laid next to him.

Harry cuddled up to him. "Make me feel wanted." He whispered low.

Sirius looked at him. "Harry..."

Harry clung to his shirt. "Please...P-please."

Sirius moved above him.

Harry ran his fingers over Sirius' hair. "Please."

"Harry...are you sure?"

Harry nodded. "Please, just once. I won't ask again."

Sirius smirked lightly. "You say that now."

Harry smiled. "Yes, I do."

Sirius looked at him for a moment before he pressed his lips to Harry's. Harry moaned, his arms going around Sirius' neck. Sirius stroked his side, slowly pushing his tounge into Harry's mouth. Harry moaned, his blunt nails scrathing Sirius' cloth back. Sirius pulled back, quickly getting rid of their clothes. Harry moaned softly and ran his hand over Sirius' bare chest, feeling the slight muscle that was there. Sirius took Harry's hand in his own and lightly ran his thumb over it. Harry watched him.

Sirius smiled and kissed Harry's hand. "I love you."

"Love you too." Harry whispered, leaning foward and kissing Sirius again.

Sirius smiled and touched his forehead to Harry's. "Are you ready?"

Harry nodded.

Sirius slowly entered him.

Harry gasped at the pain and clenched Sirius' arms painfully.

Sirius stoked his cheek. "It'll get better, I promise."

Harry closed his eyes and tried not to think about the pain he was feeling at the moment. Dead or not, it _hurt_. A lot.

Slowly, Harry moved his hips, a low moan came from his lips. Sirius smiled and lightly began to thrust into him. Harry felt when Sirius began to move and wrapped his legs around Sirius' waist. Sirius' hands held his hips, moving his own at a quickening pace.

"F-faster." Harry moaned in a whisper.

Sirius did just as he was asked, taking Harry's cock and rubbing it as he did.

Harry's back arched as his orgasm took him in full swing.

Sirius followed in suit, moaning as he did. He slowly slid out of Harry.

Harry pulled him down, giving him a long and loving kiss.

Sirius slowly let himself fall on Harry.

Harry's arms wrapped around him in welcome. He was finally happy and no one could stop it. He let out a small yelp at a sudden pain.

Sirius quickly moved back.

"W-what's going on?" Harry whispered, watching his body disappear.

"You weren't completly dead, it's not your time yet."

Harry clung to Sirius with all his might. "Please, I don't want to go back. I want to stay with you."

Sirius kissed his cheek lightly. "You'll see me again some day. Besides, you might want to stay around, people want you alive."

Harry still clung to Sirius, despite already knowing he wouldn't stay. "I love you."

"I love you too. But your place isn't here Harry."

"Sirius." Harry whispered, completly disappearing now. He was gone.


	3. Waking Up

Waking Up

Harry gasped, his eyes flooding opened as soon as he felt the pain in his chest. What had happened. Then he remembered, remembered being with Sirius. Remembered being happy. A broke sob broke from him. He was in so much pain, he didn't realize someone was next to him. Waiting for him to calm down enough to talk.

"Harry." They whispered. "Why?"

Harry turned, bright green eyes full of tears. He turned to see Bill. "WHY?!" He yelled, punching Bill in the chest. He flinched, his hand now hurting.

Bill gently took his hand, softly rubbing it with his thumb.

Harry yanked his hand away, cradling it to his chest. "Leave me alone!" He hissed.

"Why?" Bill asked.

"I want to die! I have no one! LEAVE ME ALONE!" Harry stood from his bed, lightly moving back and forth from blood loss.

"Harry stop it." Bill said firmly.

"Why won't you leave? Don't you get it, I DON'T CARE!"

Bill gripped his shoulders firmly and held him still, despite the struggle. Harry stared up at him with unbelievable pain in his eyes. A broke cry threatened to escape Harry, but he didn't let it. His bottom lip quivered as he didn't let it go. Bill moved one of his hands to Harry's cheeks, stroking it as he watched Harry. It hurt him to watch Harry suffer. He remember when Molly had said that Sirius had died. It had pained Harry. Remus and Tonks dieing did the same. Losing so many friends had hurt Harry. Bill wasn't real sure what to say.

Harry moved away from Bill. "You'll tell them."

Bill didn't move. "No, I won't."

Harry stared at him.

Bill wrapped his arms around him. "Just stop, that's all you have to do."

Harry didn't reply, just stayed quiet.

"I told Mom you fell asleep last night. She doesn't know you about died."

Harry nodded, not saying a word.


	4. Proving That You Are Loved

Proving That You Are Loved

Harry stared out the window, not really touching his food. It had been a month since his near death experience. He was now back at his own house. He didn't look up as he went back to the room he slept in. Sirius' old room. Harry slumped on the bed and laid down on the pillow. He didn't mess with the blanket. He liked being cold. It kept him from the pain. His eyes closed, tears coming from them.

XXX

Harry opened his eyes the next morning, feeling really warm. He soon realized someone had put the blanket over him. He kicked it off the bed and wrapped his arms around his knees. He laid still. Very still, knowing someone else was in the house with him. He didn't move from his spot.

"I see you're up." It was Bill.

"Leave me alone. You've caused me enough pain."

Bill walked to him and lightly pulled Harry to him.

Harry tried to push him away but couldn't, his body was too weak.

"You won't win. We both know that."

Harry didn't speak.

Bill lightly stroked Harry's hair. "You're so beautiful." He murmured.

Harry didn't say anything, just stayed quiet.

"So pretty. So gentle. So sweet. So kind. So soft. So loving." Bill lightly kissed his lips, unable to stop himself.

Harry pushed himself toward Bill, couldn't help it. His body yearned for the touch of someone. Anyone. His body begged for it. Bill kissed him again, this time longer. Softly, sweeter.

Harry moaned, his blunt nails clawing at Bill's shirt.

Bill stopped him.

Harry whimpered.

"Not now, just rest. Stay calm."

Harry laid his head on Bill's chest. "Stay." He whispered.

Bill laid a hand on his back. "Of course." He murmured, kissing Harry's head softly.


	5. A Night To Remember

A Night To Remember

Harry slowly walked into his house. He saw a single muli-colored (red, white, pink, blue, and purple) rose on the coffee table. He stared at it. There was no way it was real. They didn't excist. He picked it up and felt the pedels. They were real! But...how?

"It's an interesting rose, isn't it?" A voice said.

Harry turned to see Bill standing by the window. "H-how?"

Bill chuckled. "You wouldn't _belive_ someone can actually _grow_ these."

Harry stared at him. "But I don't get it."

Bill wrapped an arm around his waist and kissed him softly.

Harry wrapped his arms around Bill's neck, slowly moving close to him.

Bill pulled away, tracing Harry's cheek bone.

Harry shivered. "Mmm." He whispered softly, kissing Bill softly.

Bill smiled softly and carefully pushed Harry away.

Harry whimpered.

Bill kissed his nose. "Come on."

Harry followed him up to his (Harry's) room.

XXX

Bill pushed Harry down slowly and kissed him hard. Both were lacking a shirt. Soon, Bill trailed his lips to Harry's chest, softly kissing his peaks and sucking at them. Harry arched his back and pulled Bill's hair free from its band. His fingers ran though it, feeling the soft locks that were there.

Bill pulled away from Harry.

Harry looked at him.

"Lube?"

Harry shook his head.

Bill bit his lip, he didn't want to hurt Harry.

"A spell?" Harry whispered.

Bill nodded, quickly doing one to scretch Harry.

Harry shivered as he felt the spells effect.

Bill caught him in a quick kiss and quickly slid into him.

Harry pulled back with a scream.

"Hush, it'll get better." Bill rested his forehead to Harry's.

Harry didn't reply. So it was in his death he wasn't a virgin anymore. Alive, he was still a virgin.

Bill slowly was able to move. Harry shivered and lashed as Bill carefully thrust into him. It wasn't long before he had turned into a moaning and gasping mess. His breathing coming out in pants. His body being covered in sweat. Stars dancing before his eyes as Bill hit his sweet spot. It was amazing.

Harry's undoing came when Bill kissed him. Not out of the sudden shock. But the sudden feel of so much love. It was so soft and gentle. So careful and slow. Harry moaned as he came, never being touched. Bill pulled back slowly and kissed Harry's forehead. He smiled at the tired half-lidded green eyes in front of him.

It wasn't long before they both fell asleep.

Somewhere in the hevens, a smile was placed on a face. Seeing his godson finally happy after his death. It was finally over. Harry and he were at peace.

The end?

Sequel or no sequel? Up to you.


End file.
